9th Feb 2010
Are we allowed scripturally to marry a foreign wife?
Scripture only prohibits us not to marry into 7 nations that are mentioned in Deut 7:1-4.
- Hittites
- Girashites
- Amorites
- Cannanites
- Perizzites
- Hivites
- Jebusites
Deu 7:1 (KJV) When the LORD thy God shall bring thee into the land whither thou goest to possess it, and hath cast out many nations before thee, the Hittites, and the Girgashites, and the Amorites, and the Canaanites, and the Perizzites, and the Hivites, and the Jebusites, seven nations greater and mightier than thou;
Deu 7:3 (KJV) Neither shalt thou make marriages with them; thy daughter thou shalt not give unto his son, nor his daughter shalt thou take unto thy son.
All 7 of these nations are today extinct or merged into other nations and we cannot be sure who is who any longer, therefore the injunction does not apply.
Therefore my advise to most of my fellow brothers in the faith is to get a foreign wife who will love you and submit to the G-d of Israel.
One culture that I can highly recommend is the Chinese Culture. At the end of this article I give you the details for a marriage agency in Qingdao run by my friend for foreigners wanting to marry in China and why a Chinese wife is the best wife suited to you in the west. I would say equally a Thai or Philippine wife may be good but I have more information on China then the other two.
Most of the Chinese women there are either into no religion or are mildly Buddhist. If you love your wife I can guarantee you that she will follow and serve the G-d of Israel. This model has been already perfected by the Muslims who marry into foreign cultures to marry non-Muslim wives and then later convert them into their religion. Even British and US Caucasian women have converted into Islam like this therefore Islam has a lot of organic growth. The secret for us is to get organic growth and stop wasting time running around after disobedient women. And by the way forget those Pastors who are clueless about G-d’s law and do not know which woman to marry, they misquote Rabbi Paulos’ letter of 2 Corinthians 6:14 which has nothing to do with marriages but many Christians erroneously apply to marriage.
2Co 6:14 (KJV) Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness?
In our case there is no biblical precept that says we cannot marry a Buddhist or a Muslim woman as long as she is willing to submit to the G-d of Israel we have no restriction to marry. This is set in the law of G-d. Even the Patriarchs of our faith knew this. Jacob married to Rachel and Leah and neither was fully submitted to the G-d of Israel until after the marriage but they were obedient and humble women and this is what you need in a wife which you will get in the foreign culture and you will not find in your razzmatazz western culture. If on the other hand you want to marry a Christian Chinese then there are plenty of those too, not they are usually more faithful than their western counterparts generally.
Deu 21:11 (KJV) And seest among the captives a beautiful woman, and hast a desire unto her, that thou wouldest have her to thy wife;
The verse above does not just apply to a woman in war time but a captive could equally be captive in another religion and in another culture and if you like her and want to marry her then G-d fully approves for your to marry her. Noting that you are not to force your faith upon her but with time and love she will follow you as always there will be a period of courtship which will allow you to see how she reacts to you and your faith. I have found the response of the Chinese ladies very favorable. The other ladies that are good in this area re the Thai and Philippine ladies. Most Pilipino ladies are Catholic by the way while the Thai ones might again be Buddhist.
Note that King Solomon a righteous king of Israel married the daughter of the king of Egypt but he did not force her to convert first. Understanding comes first and conversion next with love and humility they will obey you. Note not all of King Solomon’s wives were into false worship.
The Western women unfortunately a majority of them are not fit for wives as they are not only disobedient but refuse to obey the husband. Steer clear of such women if you want a peaceful life.
1Ki 3:1 (KJV) And Solomon made affinity with Pharaoh king of Egypt, and took Pharaoh's daughter, and brought her into the city of David, until he had made an end of building his own house, and the house of the LORD, and the wall of Jerusalem round about.
We also must not compare ancient eastern women in Israel with modern eastern women as there was then a strong affinity to local deities and tribes but today the world is a much different place unless you go and marry a woman in Islam.
Also it was by Abraham our father’s servant who was given an oath to go find a wife for Isaac, note Rebecca knew about the G-d of Israel but was not a convert until later. There were no forced conversions. The same principle applies today, Abraham sent his servant to another country so you better be ready to travel abroad if you want a decent wife.
Gen 24:3-4 (KJV) And I will make thee swear by the LORD, the God of heaven, and the God of the earth, that thou shalt not take a wife unto my son of the daughters of the Canaanites, among whom I dwell: 4 But thou shalt go unto my country, and to my kindred, and take a wife unto my son Isaac.
What do I do if I want to marry a good Chinese wife?
Agency in Qingdao China, which is North-Eastern China. This is a one hour flight from Beijing. When you decide to marry a woman there you will need to prove your single status. In the UK this is fairly easy where you can get a single certificate from the local council and then have the two Embassies the Chinese and UK one to stamp it and notarize it and then that is all you need to go and marry in China.
There are many beautiful girls there who are willing to travel abroad with the right decent husband.
Hotel to book while in Qingdao:
Ai Zun Ko Hotel – This is about £16 UK Pounds or $22 a day and it’s a 3 star hotel with very good service close to all shops and restaurants.
#12 Fu Zhou Nan Road,
Tel: 0532-86018333
The person to contact in the agency is Jennifer who is the manager she will be able to show you the ladies she holds on her books who are looking to marry.
You can write to her by e-mail and she can make the suggestions to what is your expectation of a wife and which girl she has listed as a suitable wife for you.
Jennifer’s e-mail: flora_liu61@hotmail.com
Jennifer’s phone: 1300 650 1314 in China
There are other agencies which will also try and find you a wife but they will charge you fees over time which can all add up but the one I can giving you is the best cost basis for you to go and find your wife.
If you need any other help then by all means contact myself as I can help you with many things Chinese. Note the language is not a barrier this is very easily overcome these days with small computer translators from English to Chinese and via versa which you can purchase for less than $200.
Google online translator http://translate.google.com/#zh-CN|en|
Babel fish online translator http://babelfish.yahoo.com/
Chinese dictionary for word checker: http://us1.mdbg.net/chindict/chindict.php
Even you can talk to your prospective wife on msn chat using the Google online translator or use the Chinese QQ Chat software very popular in China.
What documents are needed for a UK national for marriage?
The local Chinese authority requires that you produce a document to show that you are free to marry. This is called a Certificate of No-Impediment (CNI) and can be obtained from the British Embassy in Beijing Consular Section or your local registrar in the UK for £30.
It should be stamped by the UK Foreign office in Milton Keynes and the Chinese Embassy in London Portland Place and then before this it should be notarized. By a notary. You can send this to a local agency and they can get both offices to stamp it for you for a cost of £100 saving you the trip.
Some places in China do not require the notary. You take this along with your passport and then your fiancée registers her details to the local office like her ID, health certificate from the hospital obtained before her marriage in order to marry and a permission to marry or to declare she is single. For women marriageable age is 20 years old and men 22. If she is younger then she needs permission from the parents.
Both: Single Status Certificate, (CNI)
You do not need divorce certificates but good to carry them with you if you are divorced or widowed.
If applicable, finalised divorce papers or death certificate of ex-spouse
for the widowed
• Both: Birth certificate – Good to have of foreign national as well.
• Together: Three official style photos of the couple together – shops
doing visa photos do these and know the correct format of them.
• Together: The fee of the local office.
• Chinese person: Household registration book
residency
(hukou)
• Foreigner: Passport (UK) or (USA)
• Foreigner: Notarised translations in Chinese of all originals not in
Chinese (except the passport. There are official translators who provide
this service in China.
When everything is completed satisfactorily, you will leave – as a married
couple! You will either be given you marriage certificate as you leave or
you might be asked to collect it in a few days. There is usually an office
close by that can do the translations of your marriage documents the two red
books one for each.
For US citizens check this site out:
http://www.marriageinchina.com/
One word of advise.
The Chinese women are not into polygamy so this is strictly for those who are espousing monogamy, marriage with one woman alone. Even though the Bible has a model of polygamy but my advise is its simpler and easier to stick to one wife and it will not complicate matters unless you have some serious reason for two wives such as your wife is not able to have children and you want to marry number two for children’s sake while still being married to the first wife or some other very important reason. In this case a Chinese woman may or may not accept such a taking and you will have to look in another culture such as the Arab culture which is much more accepting of such a practice.
Rabbi Simon