Marriage and Divorce

To most of the Western world marriage is simply a bond between a male and female of love (Eros) and mutual understanding and has nothing to do with what we term biblical commitment or the biblical model of marriage as a COVENANT. The biblical model required a life long commitment and is a COVENANT that can not be annulled in the lifetime of the two bonded together unless it was for very special circumstances that were allowed by the Rabbis but very few would like to understand TRUTH as stated in Scripture in the world of quick divorce AND remarriage.

Today in marriages if at anytime any incompatibilities or problems occur the first thing a couple look for is how to get out with a divorce and cut the tie so to speak. They do not look to reconcile or compromise with the husband but instantly issue the threat that he/she is going to divorce you. Some couples may seek to reconcile but most do not give much thought to it and break the marriage without any due diligence or Scriptural wisdom. The church today compounds the problem by giving thumbs up to a situation that God hates (Mal 2:16). An average marriage in the Western world lasts for only about two years for normal couples and less than one year for celebrities. You can count yourself fortunate if your marriage lasted anything above two years. The divorce rate in the UK is the highest in Europe showing us how protestant England faired a lot verse than Catholic France or Catholic Italy.

The reason why the Catholics faired better was simply because they would not allow divorce under any circumstances forcing the couple to realign and live together. A separation in marriage was allowed but never a divorce unless as a stated for special reasons and this is true with scripture even as stated in 1 Corinthians 7:11. This was one of the primary reasons why Catholic England became protestant England during King Henry the VIII, because of his marital issues and the reluctance of the Catholic church to allow him a second marriage. The Catholic Church erred on its position at that time by not allowing King Henry VIII on adding another wife without divorce as Biblically he could add more wives (Deut 21:15) without divorcing any of his previous wives. The Catholic church adopted one position which was true but rejected the other due to the influence of Roman Pagan and Greek culture.

Tragically this enforced serial model of Roman/Greek monogamy ruined many women’s lives during this period and is still ruining many lives today of children without fathers and wife’s without husband’s.

Marriage is a blood COVENANT and during the first night of a marriage when a couple consummate the marriage the woman’s hymen is to break shedding blood to establish the covenant until one or the other party dies. You may ask how can it be everlasting if each man and woman has a finite life. The Covenant terms were to last until the husband died because he is the head of authority not the woman hence the woman or wife was always recognised by her husband’s name and so also the children acquired the father’s name and not the mother’s. This situation is the same today in many cultures.

We need to remember the COVENANT terms are until DEATH and this is also what people recite RELIGIOUSLY in the west unless I am mistaken UNTIL DEATH DO US PART but to most of them who call themselves Christians or otherwise this does not mean DEATH but only a few months or a few years at best thus they cheat the husband or wife out of a COVENANT agreement and commit adultery on either part. I understand the COVENANT requires each party to do their bit in the marriage so it is not a FREE for all and for the men to subjugate the women in anyway or run off with another woman leaving her holding the children with no support system. The biblical laws have a support system for widows and for women generally. The man could also marry another woman while he provided a support system for the first wife.

Shemoth (Exo) 21:10 "If he takes another wife, he shall not diminish her food, her clothing, and her marriage rights.

One may ask what if the woman today files for divorce perhaps in a situation where the man is insane or psychotic but here I believe the decision rests on the elders of the assembly to decide if it is safe to apply the divorce ruling immediately or wait since no man has the right to break the covenant. There are other factors for someone’s psychosis whether it was induced as a result of illness or whether the husband defrauded the woman by not telling her in which case she can get a certificate, a Get (certificate of divorce) Deut 22:13-21. This “certificate of divorce” needs to happen early in the marriage not ten years into the marriage unless special circumstances have caused the marriage to fail such as an unjust husband from who the wife feels threatened of death!

The shedding of blood represents an everlasting covenant NEVER to be broken which means that the one consummating the marriage may be cut down and die if he/she was to break the covenant at any time in their life. Do we see this in Scripture in any part of a covenant? The answer is yes.

Gen 15:9-10 And He said to him, “Bring Me a three-year-old heifer, and a three year-old female goat, and a three-year-old ram, and a turtledove, and a young pigeon.” (10) And he took all these to Him and cut them in the middle, and placed each half opposite the other, but he did not cut the birds.

Gen 15:17 And it came to be, when the sun went down and it was dark, that see, a smoking oven and a burning torch passing between those pieces.

In the near East kings made similar covenants known as suzerain vassal where a treaty was made and the names of the ones making the treaty were signified followed by blessings if the vassal carried out the stipulations and curses if the Vassal did not! The placing and cutting of animals in half signified death to the two parties and similar cutting as of the animals if anyone was to detract or not carry out the stipulation of the covenant.

Abraham was put to sleep so God was fully responsible for bringing about the promises He made to Abraham and His seed.

In a marriage both parties the husband and wife are making a blood covenant. Men are allowed more than one wife so there should never be a question of divorce but polyandry is forbidden in the Bible so the woman has to accept that this is how God created her for man, not for men to abuse their authority. Scripture do not allow mixing of seed hence why polyandry is forbidden in the Scriptures.

The wife is to be submitted to her husband in love and not usurp authority as many are doing today. Those women that are usurping authority by deliberately divorcing their husbands have no rewards in the kingdom to come. If the wife has maligned her husband to get a divorce or vice versa then that person could potentially be ejected from the kingdom and be thrown out and not be saved so slander (evil speech) is out. Going to church and singing a few nice hymns is not going to help either party.

The ones that do make it into the kingdom will not have any position of authority if the divorce was based on a flawed reason and there will even be marriages in the kingdom so what God does with these women or men will be revealed to us in due course. An argument or a fight over food or money is not a reason to divorce your spouse but separation is allowed until reconciliation if there is a valid reason such as the husband drinks too much and is drunk all the time or he abuses the wife physically then certainly an unrepentant husband gives the wife full reason for a divorce.

1 Cor 7:39 A wife is bound by Torah as long as her husband lives, and if her husband dies, she is free to be married to whom she desires, only in the Master.

Paul the Pharisee concluded beautifully the marital covenant, the Torah expounds on that unless the husband dies the wife must stay put yet today in our society we can have what is termed divorce on demand where a wife can demand a divorce even if the husband has not been unfaithful. Sadly such men or women can never be blessed in this life or the next. They lose their rewards and that will be hard to swallow in the world to come. Many of these people will be slaves in the kingdom because they refused to obey the Father’s Torah. As I stated some will be evicted from the kingdom for lashon hara (evil speech).

We will look at the different scenarios but first let us see if a divorce is at all possible.

Devarim (Deut) 22:13-21 “When any man takes a wife, and shall go in to her, and shall hate her, (14) and shall make abusive charges against her and bring an evil name on her and say, ‘I took this woman, and when I came to her I did not find her a maiden,’ (15) then the father and mother of the young woman shall take and bring out the proof of the girl’s maidenhood to the elders of the city at the gate. (16) “And the girl’s father shall say to the elders, ‘I gave my daughter to this man as wife, and he hates her. (17) ‘And see, he has made abusive charges against her, saying, “I did not find your daughter a maiden,” and yet these are the proofs of my daughter’s maidenhood.’ And they shall spread the garment before the elders of the city. (18) “And the elders of that city shall take that man and punish him, (19) and fine him one hundred pieces of silver and give them to the father of the young woman, because he has brought an evil name on a maiden of Yisra’ĕl. And she is to be his wife, he is not allowed to put her away all his days. (20) “But if the matter is true, that the girl was not found a maiden, (21) then they shall bring out the girl to the door of her father’s house, and the men of her city shall stone her to death with stones, because she has done wickedness in Yisra’ĕl, to whore in her father’s house. Thus you shall purge the evil from your midst.

The important Hebrew words to note she played a whore in Israel in her father’s house.

We can see that a divorce is possible in only really only one scenario and it is what we term FRAUD. This happened while the girl was in her father’s house. Note it is cutting of the covenant and not a paper divorce as we understand it. Most of our societies today are built on paganism not biblical laws so let’s get that straight. Just because they have culled some laws from the Bible to use in their pagan systems we cannot say they are obeying or built on Bible laws that is a mistake that many believers make. Certainly the governments what they have sowed they are reaping now.

If a girl has slept with someone and betrothed to another this was/is according to Torah a capital crime then she will not bleed on the first night and the man she married to finds out about it would create a big issue and it would be a problem for the man of course and for the girl. I will point out that sometimes in some exceptional circumstances a girl’s hymen may dissolve without sexual contact for many reasons in which case a girl may not bleed which does not mean that she has been unfaithful but that does not preclude the man suspecting her of Fraud still.

If the husband hates his wife for no apparent reason the Torah mandates that he could be fined and not allowed to put his wife away for life and but if the matter was true then the girl could be stoned outside her father’s house which would have become a public disgrace for the family. So we need to understand that this would be for a man who hated his wife without a reason, a selfish cruel man, it is not nice for a man to fall this low towards the one he claims to love or have loved! I will point out that though the Torah gave one injunction for divorce but the leading two rabbinic schools before Yahushua allowed divorces on various other grounds one of which believe it or not was bad cooking.

YHWH’s provision was not to have rampant divorce but he provided provision for the hatred that ensued in the marriage because of the man. Technically this law is to deal with the hatred of a man who cannot control his passion so if I be blunt it is to deal with a man from being cruel to his wife. I will also suggest that if a man is cruel to his wife during the marriage even in later years such as physical abuse she can legitimately enter a divorce plea if he is unwilling to repent of his bad behaviour to his wife.

So the precursor for divorce is Fraud due to fornication/adultery before departure of the girl. Please note biblical marriages were done once betrothal is committed and after this it was simply departure of the girl at a time when the Father of the bridegroom decides to send his son to collect the bride. The same analogy applies to us waiting for our Bridegroom Yahushua. In Muslim lands this is still practiced where a girl is wed in her father’s house but the departure does not occur until an agreed time later such as one year or two years or even several years depending on the girl’s age. In Israel it was determined by the father of the bridegroom usually up to one year.

One must understand that FRAUD can apply to either party in so far as a man can lie to a woman and later turn out to be a thief and scoundrel and she can get an annulment or divorce certificate called a “Get” by Rabbis so this is not a one sided law. The Torah laws are very fair and just. Sadly most Christians are not taught these but they still apply. We will look at other reasons and if they are viable. So what happens if the woman is found to be a fornicator, the result sadly is not DIVORCE on demand but DEATH OF THE WOMAN and it is immediate and no Betty was not on death row for ten years while the husband holds on or Tim is on death row while Betty waits and endures the trauma for ten years. Israel did not have huge complexes for prisons but a ward where some guards would hold the culprit and justice would be very swift. The West unfortunately comes no where near the justice standards of Torah provisions. Israel did not feed the criminals on Tax payer’s dollars with cable TV, games, education for five years before deciding their fate. Enter the ridiculous prison culture of the West.

Even in Islam’s sha’ria laws come close to Israel’s swift justice system in swiftness to execute someone but not to the justice standards of the Torah as the law in Islam is implemented without due diligence, witnesses and regards for the person on trial. Many times the culprits get away because of a high up connections and the innocent party gets executed instead. This would NEVER happen in Israel.

However crime figures in a pure Islamic state like Saudi Arabia are far lower than most Western nations. People can leave their shops and go to prayers without worrying about theft but try to leave your tills in Tesco’s and Wal-Mart and you will come back to an empty store with thieves galore. The cameras will catch people who are shoplifting for sure but because of the lack of capital punishment and its swiftness of justice it’s a happy day for the thieves in Western lands carrying TVs, fridges, DVD players and the sort.

So both systems the Islamic and the Western lack with what God had given us to do. On comparison the Western system seems better/fairer but actually it is worse than the Islamic system because if you cannot pay for a good lawyer the chances of you getting true justice is fairly remote as the ones who can afford the better lawyer will get the better justice.

Now coming back to Betty you can see is it right that a life should be wasted like this because of a mistake committed and if the one committing the mistake realises her fault and is repentant?

Would you want this for the one you took an oath with to love and to cherish to be dead?

The same law though misunderstood by many so called experts is also found in Deut 24:1-4.

Please note this is a complete paragraph from verses one to four and don’t go by how it is split up in the KJV as it is not one verse in fact the Hebrew thought is 4 verses altogether correctly illustrated in the JP Bible.

Jewish Publication Bible which as a more accurate way of separating the Hebrew text join.

Deuteronomay 24:1-4 When a man taketh a wife, and marrieth her, then it cometh to pass, if she find no favour in his eyes, because he hath found some unseemly thing in her, that he writeth her a bill of divorcement, and giveth it in her hand, and sendeth her out of his house, (2) and she departeth out of his house, and goeth and becometh another man's wife, (3) and the latter husband hateth her, and writeth her a bill of divorcement, and giveth it in her hand, and sendeth her out of his house; or if the latter husband die, who took her to be his wife; (4) her former husband, who sent her away, may not take her again to be his wife, after that she is defiled; for that is abomination before HaShem; and thou shalt not cause the land to sin, which HaShem thy G-d giveth thee for an inheritance.

The word for “favour” in verse one is chen and means “favour”, “grace”, “elegance” and “acceptance”. When a husband finds out his wife had slept with someone before she married to him he becomes angry and thus has no more favour or elegance or charm for his wife. Sadly this happens a lot in Eastern Cultures and men can become very cruel to their wives, I have seen this first hand in Pakistan where Muslims can even kill their wives for this type of thing and this can create lifelong feuds. In Israel God allowed a hot headed man to cool himself down therefore a provision was made that if proven did not lead to divorce as most think but the DEATH OF THE WOMAN. Life is precious so we must think is this what we want for the sake of our hatred to kill someone else! If it takes someone else’s death that you thought you loved to pacify your anger then I must say something is not right with this type of man.

It is again provision for what to do when a husband has lost his love for his wife and is burning with the passion of hatred. Many people discover the divorce law here but what I found upon God showing me here is how to deal with the uncleanness that a husband has found in his wife or has been made known to him after the marriage has consummated. To me this is not dealing with divorce at all as we all thought but the same principle as in Deut 22:13 where a husband finds no favour for his wife and could not love her any longer, started hating his wife and here also the idea is one husband whose heart has become hard and has also lost favour so he puts his wife away quietly rather than the public fanfare.

Have you ever wondered when the Pharisees came to Yahushua in Matthew chapter 5, why didn’t the Messiah simply quote Deut 24:1 and say go and be done with it?

Mat 19:5 and said, ‘For this cause a man shall leave his father and mother and cleave to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’?

If one understands this then why did the Messiah quote the passage from creation? This is because there was no provision for divorce but how to deal with the hatred that occurs either in a male or female when one loses favour for the other.

Hence why the Messiah said Moses did it for the hardness of men’s hearts or women’s for that matter.

Mat 19:7-8 They said to Him, “Why then did Mosheh command to give a certificate of divorce, and to put her away?” 8 He said to them, “Because of the hardness of your hearts, Mosheh allowed you to put away your wives, but from the beginning it was not so.

The provision was made not because it was right but because of men’s hearts, it was not divorce if proven but DEATH. If a man sent his wife away quietly it was accepted that a man was hard hearted and could not bear with his wife. This actually occurred with Joseph too in the Renewed Covenant when he knew his wife was with child, he was a righteous man and decided to put his wife away quietly but God told him not to as she was conceived with child through the Father and the Ruach Ha Kodesh (Holy Spirit).

Mat 1:19 Then Joseph her husband, being a just man, and not willing to make her a public example, was minded to put her away privily.

Question) What if my wife to be has already had sexual contact with someone before marriage and has told me that this happened then what?

Answer) We are Yisrael and not heathens and do not behave as the nations do so MERCY and JUSTICE are our highest calling. A lot of us talk about it but sadly few really practice it. In this case you can marry the girl and the matter is closed as long as she has repented of her sin to God and she is faithful to you as your wife there is no concern and you are not allowed to beat her up over it figuratively speaking for the rest of her life. If you cannot marry this girl or just because you found this out and it has hurt your feelings then it would be better that you would tell her at the point of finding out before marriage and drop the relationship rather than use this as an excuse to divorce her later to bring disgrace to yourself from God and disappointment and disrespect to her and her household.

This does not mean that the marriage covenant does not stand because there is no shedding of blood (breaking of the hymen), the marital commitment still stands for each party to the point of death since the witness is the God of Israel, who lives and never dies we must know what we are entering is serious business and not a game. A cord of three cannot be easily broken. (Ecc 4:12)

People who want to divorce usually read divorce into this but the Messiah Yahushua confirmed what the terms of the Deuteronomy 22:13-21 stipulations were if we are careful to read them.

Mat 5:31 “And it has been said, ‘Whoever puts away his wife, let him give her a certificate of divorce.’ (32) “But I say to you that whoever puts away his wife, except for the matter of whoring, makes her commit adultery. And whoever marries a woman who has been put away commits adultery.

When the Messiah said “it has been said” He was not referring to Torah principles but to the ideas of Pharisees and Sadducees of marriage and divorce but He also quoted what Moses wrote given of course by The Messiah Himself on Mount Sinai. The Messiah suggested “whoring” not Adultery although it could qualify o be both physical and spiritual adultery and even idolatry.

If you check the Hebrew, Yahushua used the same Hebrew words found in Deuteronomy 22:21 L’ Zanot, He did not connect this with Deuteronomy 24:1 but with Deuteronomy 22:21 and that is significantly important because He was making the connection with Fraud and not just wilful divorce as had started to happen in the first century Jewish Israeli society.

Whoring occurs when a woman before her marriage goes and sleeps with different men who she does not intend to marry. Can she commit adultery after marriage? Yes because if she is betrothed and before the departure to her husband’s home sleeps around then yes she is whoring, while being married and has actually committed adultery, which was/is a serious sin.

Deutronomy 24:1-4 “When a man takes a wife and shall marry her, then it shall be, if she finds no favour in his eyes because he has found a matter of uncoveredness in her, and he shall write her a certificate of divorce, and put it in her hand, and send her out of his house, (2) and if she left his house and went and became another man’s wife, (3) and the latter husband shall hate her and write her a certificate of divorce, and put it in her hand, and send her out of his house, or when the latter husband dies who took her to be his wife, (4) then her former husband who sent her away is not allowed to take her back to be his wife after she has been defiled, for that would be an abomination before יהוה. And do not bring sin on the land which יהוה your Elohim is giving you as an inheritance.

We can see that the matter still related to FRAUD. If the husband found out in the marriage that his wife had been unclean or irresponsible in her past before being married to him then he could do the same thing as Deuteronomy 22-13-21 suggests but you may ask how come the matter in the previous scriptures was one of putting away and being public about it while here it is not public and no stoning was involved.

This is because the matter is one of Mercy and Justice. In the discourse of Deuteronomy 22:13-21 situation the husband being unjust made his wife’s matter public and brought open shame to the whole family, while in Deuteronomy 24:1-4 the husband does not want to bring open shame to his wife and privately divorces her meaning he is a bit more gracious but not gracious enough to forgive the wife and simply accept bygones as bygones and live with her in love and harmony that is if the wife also wants to live in harmony.

3 putting her away if her past affair bothers you but no divorce as our current society model has established both with unrighteous and unjust laws. However I agree that the some of the injunction of the Rabbis were correct to prevent abuse and unjustice.

If the man cannot exercise his mercy and justice to accept the fact that what happened in the woman’s past was something in her past and not present and that it should not be dwelt on. Forgiveness is the order of the day.

How about if you commit a sin and the penalty we know is death (Eze 18:4) then what if I told you that you must die no matter what? Would you be happy that there is no way out? Hence why we know the Messiah made a way out for us because we were all destined to die otherwise but because of Him we live.

We needed a way out and it was provided by the Father in heaven through His Son. On either part of the husband or wife they MUST be willing to forgive the other party in a dispute else it is openly shameful to both families to carry out a public divorce since even God does not approve of a divorce as we all traditionally thought because it will either lead to stoning of the woman or her being married to you forever. The putting away privately is a more humane option in premarital sex pure and simple but not a ground for divorce.

My question is this that the second most important commandment is to love your neighbour as yourself Lev 19:18 and Matt 22:39 so if you are to love your neighbour then why can’t you love your spouse and forgive the past or present circumstance that is hounding you? Why would you want to publicly humiliate your wife or husband for that matter? This is not a righteous thing to do and would bring shame upon the whole assembly of Israel and God never approves of such matters no matter who the guilty party is.

This is why He asked to put this behind Israel and remove it by death. The marital covenant is until DEATH.

If a wife has dealt with her husband treacherously or vice versa in a matter concerning adultery or non-adulterous matter, could even be for a household dispute or in a dispute where a religious or non religious matter is not shared between one spouse then this thing is most shameful and will bring reproach on both parties and whoever has brought this shame will have to suffer the consequences and lose rewards and a special place in the kingdom to come.

Just because the husband or wife have the support of fifty people does not make the action right in the Father’s eyes. The wife or husband the guilty party may not lose their salvation but they will certainly lose their rewards and any authority they were to possess in the coming kingdom. I ask is it worth it for the sake of this short life? A wife could publicly slander her husband and any parties that are involved in doing likewise will all have to answer for their rebellion in front of the King one day or did you think that all is hunky-dory jakanory, go to Church on Sunday, sing a few hymns, have cup of tea but its ok to slander? No, nothing escapes the King’s attention and is meticulously recorded by the angels appointed to you for judgment day. WHEN BOOKS ARE OPENED YOU WILL BE FOUND WANTING AND GUILTY SO THINK THROUGH PRAYERFULLY OF ALL YOUR ACTIONS PLEASE FOR YOUR SAKE.

The most cruel thing to do is to publicly slander your husband or wife showing complete lack of mercy or justice even if he or she is guilty. YES EVEN IF HE/SHE IS GUILTY IT DOES NOT MAKE IT RIGHT. Anyone acting in this fashion has got a big thing coming and prepare for Day of Judgment because what you have sown you will definitely reap IN THIS LIFE and the next. Some of you will be evicted from the kingdom for this type of behaviour.

Job 4:8 Even as I have seen, they that plow iniquity, and sow wickedness, reap the same. (9) By the blast of God they perish, and by the breath of his nostrils are they consumed.

What do you think that Yahushua was publicly flogged spat upon and shouted at, did it make it right for Him to have these beatings considering He was innocent? Do you think in the world to come would those spitting on his face and lashing him will get a reward in the kingdom perhaps because Yahushua had to die? The wicked will get their just punishment like Judas Iscariot. Just because he was a disciple was it right that he sold his Rabbi for thirty pieces of silver? Sadly some in churches will not be able to enter the kingdom because of their unjust behaviour in this world so be careful how you treat others! Yahushua’s death and resurrection is not a license for sin as many have made it to be.

If you have a problem with any teachings in the bible and you make it your mission to slander God’s appointed people or your spouse then you will have to pay the price as long as that brother or sister is holding to a Torah precept that is true such as had happened with some recently believing in Torah polygamy. This is Torah Truth and no amount of Church legislation is going to remove what the Father has clearly allowed in His perfect will. Hellenist scholars are not going to defeat sound Hebrew biblical teaching and the followers of that teaching.

I speak from experience don’t slander your spouse, because slandering is a sin that can keep you out of the kingdom. Hold your mouth and keep peace, YHWH will reward you for it. A wife slandering her spouse or vice versa does not make these actions just and right even if your spouse has done something wrong because love covers a multitude of sins.

Would that make an ensuing divorce on demand right? To many Christians yes but to us Nazarenes no, it remains to be a sin and the woman is committing sin and the martial covenant cannot end without death, the piece of paper a woman is attempting to receive from courts is meaningless and has no authority in heaven unless the husband releases her by his own free will. No amount of public slander against the head of the house (husband) is the righteous or merciful thing to do. What should have been done in any difficult situation is prayer to seek the Father’s will in the matter if it is His will for that marriage not public slander. No Israelite woman was ever glorified in scriptures for doing as this.

Those that tell you divorce is ok ask them to show you a public divorce in the bible. You won’t find one.

Eph 5:22-23 Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto YHWH. (23) For the husband is the head of the wife, even as the Messiah is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body.

The woman was created for man and not man for woman hence why the man has to die to terminate the covenant. I know many Rabbi’s would disagree with this but I stand corrected with Rabbi Yahushua who said both were created as one flesh and let no man separate what Elohim has put together.

Some ladies file a divorce for such matters and yet scripture does not allow divorce but this is the reality that we have to bear for living in the West where the women are simply out of control and think they are being holy and fighting a holy jihad against the polygamist belief but actually they are acting in the spirit of Jezebel and for every sin there will be a consequence and a repercussion that they will have to bear both here and in the world to come. Be warned in the end they have a lot more to lose than to gain I assure you of this. Unrighteous behaviour can never be given rewards and a pat on the back.

God gave a curse to the first woman for her disobedience for the rest of her days and ALL women today are still bearing it today and so are the men even though Yahushua died and rose again that curse remains. Chava (Eve) usurped Adam’s authority to eat the fruit and on top of that fed it back to him. The moral of the story is do not listen to a woman in matters of God because the man has already been instructed, obey God’s voice. This is not about putting women down no not at all but faithful management of God’s estate so women are not put down and kept in check and loved righteously. If Abraham had asked Sarah’s advise to sacrifice his son Sarah would have objected and could even have called Abraham a lunatic for even suggesting something like this but he was a wise man who did not tell Sarah what he was about to do in order to protect her. Exercise wisdom in all matters and don’t say God did not tell you this. Ask God to show you if He has spoken what is the right thing to do.

Using the standard of mercy and justice the matter must be committed to YHWH because to exercise justice and righteousness rather than hatred, slander and strife is the righteous thing to do. We have to accept the fact that someone’s spouse may not share a Torah belief nor what God has shown a husband and that person to remain quite knowing God is equitable and His throne rests on Justice and Righteousness (Ps 89:14) and will vindicate that person over time. Never be bitter and do not fall down low to backstab other people because I know God can pay back and do not go all out to destroy your wife or husband this is the most unrighteous action, avoid it at all cost. I am not writing this from just reading the bible but personal experience, I know the pain and anguish and it is difficult when it happens to you but it is necessary and prudent to endure for His sake. Life does not end here after thirty or forty years but think of the Olam Haba (the world to come). You will be rewarded, while the other person will have to stand with a shamed face, to face the consequences of that action in front of YHWH the just and true God.

Psa 103:6 The Lord executeth righteousness and judgment for all that are oppressed.

I know some people who were slandered on and off the internet including myself but we must keep serving the Father faithfully awaiting His justice. Do not be ashamed even though many people may be against you for a Torah truth, it may be that this was purely a trial for your life and hopefully many others would learn important scriptural lessons from this. We are not to take justice in our own hands but we are to act justly there is a huge difference. One’s pain is many others gain. Yahushua’s death was our gain, remember the model. The just one died for All the unjust of Israel to pay for their sin.

John 15:13 Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends.

So is your spouse not your friend to suffer for and would you be willing to lay down your life for her/him or do you want to publicly slander her/him? Love requires a sacrifice and is not determined by our financial worth or our ego or pride.

Glory to God because I know many prophets in Israel suffered for YHWH’s commandments when others around them refused to believe them. Moses the greatest prophet ever born is our best example who had to deal with Korah’s rebellion and his own relatives his elder brother and his sister turning against him in rebellion that saw Miriam becoming leprous. If a man like Moses who spoke to God face to face was not spared then what are we but dust and no comparison? Our persecution is nothing in such matters because none of us have seen God as did Moses. Honestly our pain is water on a camel’s back. I know we have many failings and do things wrong at times but I pray that we will learn humility and to glorify Him in all our situations.

1Cor 7:11 But and if she depart, let her remain unmarried, or BE RECONCILED TO HER HUSBAND: and let not the husband put away his wife.

How many churches are teaching you to do the above of separation unto reconciliation?

I am doubtful looking at the divorce rates that there are many such places of worship teaching this.

If a matter is harsh Paul’s admonition or halacha was for the wife or husband to SEPARATE for a time and then reunite upon reconciliation but today the men or women would refuse to agree with God’s words and rather breach the covenant altogether. If a wife or husband is put in such a position this does not mean that just because a local or national court has given the petitioner the divorce certificate therefore it is acceptable in God’s sight because it is NEVER acceptable and the wife in such a position would remain the wife of that husband by Torah which is Heaven’s law and by subsequently remarrying she would end up in Adultery (Mark 10-11-12) and that marriage could NEVER be blessed and will be fraught with problems since YHWH does not change (Mal 3:6). She will get a double divorce that is what I have seen to date or she will look to escape that second marriage also because of unhappiness. As I stated unless the first husband has legally and without coercion happily released her only then is she able to go away and remarry without the consequence of adultery.

Mar 10:12 And if a woman shall put away her husband, and be married to another, she committeth adultery.

You may ask what if the woman divorces her husband but does not remarry herself would then she be committing adultery?

First of all no woman who divorces her husband in such an affair vows to live an ascetic life but even if she did she is still GUILTY OF THE SIN OF REBELLION which is the sin of witchcraft. God does not see asceticism as more pious and asceticism is never held above marriage. This idea only existed in the early church fathers minds some of whom were hermits with a Greek idea of piety and nothing to do with the Hebrew roots of our faith.

Gal 5:18-21 But if ye be led of the Spirit, ye are not under the law. 19 Now the works of the flesh are manifest, which are these; Adultery, fornication, uncleanness, lasciviousness, 20 Idolatry, witchcraft, hatred, variance, emulations, wrath, strife, seditions, heresies, 21 Envyings, murders, drunkenness, revellings, and such like: of the which I tell you before, as I have also told you in time past, that they which do such things shall not inherit the kingdom of Elohim.

Rabbi Paul lists twenty works of the flesh, the number 10 is the number of Judgment in Hebrew, no wonder the number 20 is double of 10 which leads to being outside the Kingdom of YAH. Heaven forbid I don’t want anyone to be outside the kingdom of heaven but the danger is that only one work of the flesh is needed to put you in the DANGER zone. Think carefully.

If you have a rebellious wife how many of the above categories does she fall into? While the rebellious one thinks she is doing a jihad against her husband the foolishness is evident that her jihad is not against the husband at all but against God who is RESTORING all things.

Question) What do I do with my wife who is rebellious and is physically abusing me?

Answer) If your wife is slapping you around or pushing you physically then this is really taking the cake. You have the eternal judge who will find a way to assist you so first and foremost make your request by prayer to God.

The second thing is to talk to her and if she does not listen then she needs to be separated ASAP and removed from the dwelling, you may be able to get a court order that refrains her from doing this but if there are children involved then the local govt might throw you out instead. Ouch. Who said this world is just.

If you are getting a beating because of a disability and cannot defend yourself or some other reason like she is very strong and will beat you black and blue since you are weak because of a disability. It might sound funny but it has happened to some. You can appeal to the local authorities but success is dependent on whose story they are likely to believe. Women always get the upper hand in the Greco/Roman western culture.

Failing to get a court order or the like you will have to remove yourself from the property and create distance between yourself and her. Divorce is not the solution for a rebellious wife but distance and prayer is. If she remains in rebellion then you can decide to terminate the marriage by divorce because of her uncleanness but a time of separation and prayer would help to decide the outcome.

Question) What do I do if I had divorced my husband and subsequently married and the divorce now realising is illegal in God’s eyes then what about the present marriage?

You are not going to like my answer but scripture is clear you are to separate in a dispute until such time as reconciliation. The wife cannot file for a divorce or remarry unless your husband divorced you before he married you meaning biblical betrothal and break up because you told him you had slept with someone else or he was defrauding you. However if you divorced your husband for any other reason there are several criteria which I cannot discuss all in here. The first one, are you or were you Israel meaning saved and in the covenants of God. If neither party was saved then your marriage was not recognised in God’s sight hence if you subsequently married there is no sin provided you are in Messiah now and part of Israel.

Question) What if you were saved but ignorantly did this while your spouse was not saved?

Sadly ignorance is not a solution to expiate past sin. Something has to give and by biblical terms your present marriage would mean dual marriage meaning you have not been properly released from the previous marriage and have got a marriage onto a marriage.

Hence ready for the painful answer I would say your present marriage is only one in public’s eyes and not in God’s. Your only hope is to seek God for a solution. I have seen such marriages completely breakdown and fail. The rosy love affair can turn out very sour and I speak from watching this in my forty five years in many couples lives. The best thing to do is get your previous husband to give you a legal get from a Rabbi to release you, which would be the merciful thing to do for him.

These are difficult issues with no yes or no answer as there are many permutations to look through. In God’s eyes you would be seen to be “whoring” with any other man after a marriage has broken unlawfully in His sight (through worldly ways). The question is what is lawful and what is unlawful that is what we as teachers have to get right through Torah legislation. This has been debated for a very long time and I am certain it will continue to be debated until the Messiah returns.

^{^[1]}We can see this pattern--which characterizes much of rabbinic action, or nonaction, for many ensuing centuries--begin to emerge in an early rabbinic dispute between the schools of Hillel and Shammai (first century B.C.E.). Shammai, the strict constructionist of biblical law, maintained that the scriptural words ervat davar [meaning "some fault or indecency," which was the standard biblical grounds for divorce] meant, literally and exclusively, "adultery." Thus, a woman's infidelity was the only legitimate grounds for divorce. Hillel, known as a liberal because he generally interpreted Scripture more broadly, interpreted ervat davar as anything that was offensive to the husband. As in most disputes, rabbinic law followed Hillel.

Question) What if a wife defiled the marriage bed and slept with another man and committed adultery after the marriage?

This matter was hotly debated in the first century also between the school of Shammai and the school of Hillel. Shammai agreed divorce was only possible in adultery/uncleanness while Hillel said in any matter one could divorce the wife but Yahushua concluded that uncleanness would allow you to put your wife away hence one could argue that this is uncleanness if not forgivable by the husband (remember the hard heart) could allow a divorce paper to be given but you have to learn to forgive if your wife is repentant else which court can you go to get her stoned to death? None for now until the third Temple and Messiah are back. Mercy and Justice must prevail. If the wife desires to be release then you have to release her through a Jewish Get which can be acquired from a Rabbi.

Why would the disciples say “this is such a hard thing” if it was so easy to divorce one’s spouse and walk away from the marriage?

Mat 19:4 And he answered and said unto them, Have ye not read, that he which made them at the beginning made them male and female,

He quoted the verses from Genesis for creation to show a woman was created for the man meaning husband. Sorry wives you have to be submitted to your husband for life and the blessing in it is that and not in running away and seeking divorce for frivolous reasons.

Mat 19:5 And said, For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh?

The man/woman (Husband/wife) are destined to be joined to each other in a sexual union to be completed as Akhad. A man can be Akhad with more than one wife but a wife cannot be Akhad with more than one man as scripture does not allow it just like the Messiah is Akhad with many of His brides. Allegorically each person is a bride but there is only ever ONE husband The Messiah. There is many to one relationship. Each Bride (believer) is Akhad with the Messiah (Bridegroom).

Mat 19:6 Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore Elohim hath joined together, let no man (or ANY man) put asunder.

NO MAN ALSO MEANS NO JUDGE OF THE LAND HAS THE RIGHT TO BRAEK A MARRIAGE COVENANT, POLYGYNY OR NO POLYGYNY, FIGHT OR NO FIGHT, ARUGMENT OR NO ARGUMENT, AGREEMENT OR DISAGREEMENT. A MARRIAGE COVENANT IS ONLY BREAKABLE BY DEATH!

This is why in the husband hating the wife scenario if proven the wife had to die or the husband had to be fined and never to divorce his wife.

Yahushua’s Disciples even found the matter difficult to absorb but friends yes it is difficult I admit hence why we need to be careful with our actions and not willy nilly be divorcing our wive/husband. We are real people with emotions and feelings and not furniture that can just be relocated and replaced from one house to the next.

If a spouse has put you in this situation then let God recompense her or him so in that case you are in no sin to remarry however your wife cannot unless you are dead or you have released her legally according to Torah by a Get.

Question) What about Abraham asking his son Ishmael to divorce his first wife, didn’t he command divorce?

Yasher 21:28-32 But she was beating her children in the tent, and she was cursing them, and she also cursed her husband Ishmael and reproached him, and Abraham heard the words of Ishmael's wife to her children, and he was very angry and displeased. 29 And Abraham called to the woman to come out to him from the tent, and the woman came and stood opposite to Abraham, for Abraham was still mounted upon the camel. 30 And Abraham said to Ishmael's wife, When thy husband Ishmael returneth home say these words to him, 31 A very old man from the land of the Philistines came hither to seek thee, and thus was his appearance and figure; I did not ask him who he was, and seeing thou wast not here he spoke unto me and said, When Ishmael thy husband returneth tell him thus did this man say, When thou comest home put away this nail of the tent which thou hast placed here, and place another nail in its stead. 32 And Abraham finished his instructions to the woman, and he turned and went off on the camel homeward.

Now the debate is whether this is a divorce or simply sending the wife back to her father’s house for a fix up? I would contend that this is not a divorce but simply sending the wife back home but again I know many Rabbis would see this as a divorce and a direct replacing of the wife. I would personally tread on caution and take the least restrictive path because Moses did the same thing with Zipporah and Zipporah returned with her father later in the story. So if it was a divorce then I would contend why did Zipporah return? I know Western culture does not understand this because here people do not return to the father’s house but the ladies go rent a place and start their life and start living with someone else. They add relationship unto an existing relationship ending up in the adultery scenario. Abraham did not command his son a divorce but send her back and fix up the nail, let it be polished and renewed.

In Middle-Eastern culture such is not the case where the woman is dependent on the father and brothers so it is a different ball game altogether. Yes she may not become a new nail but the nail will get polished and realise she made mistakes and may decide to repent else she will have to spend the rest of her days in her father’s house and this still happens in many Muslims countries today. However there is a second issue in with this where Abraham the Patriarch is the father of Ishmael and Ishmael had to obey the father so this explains his obedience to his Dad. Remember the ten commandments divorce is not mentioned but obedience to the parents is. Many Christians would do well to learn this.

The third issue was that Ishmael’s first wife was cursing her husband and had actually broken spiritual headship and this could be seen to be cursing God as the husband is directly the authority on the earth so in this case one could argue that she could be removed on the law of spiritual Zanah or spiritual idolatry safely hence why Abraham could have said to put her away. We are not told if she ever returned so to argue for divorce in the absence of this detail to me is conjecture while Moses’ story proves this can happen a send off and polish her up and a return. This is common practice in the Middle-Eastern culture.

Mat 5:32 But I say unto you, That whosoever shall put away his wife, saving for the cause of fornication, causeth her to commit adultery: and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth adultery.

a) a captive i.e. to loose his bonds and bid him depart, to give him liberty to depart

d) to release a debtor, i.e. not to press one's claim against him, to remit his debt

4) used of divorce, to dismiss from the house, to repudiate. The wife of a Greek or Roman may divorce her husband.

Mat 1:19 Then Joseph her husband, being a just man, and not willing to make her a public example, was minded to put her away privily.

This is why Joseph a just man and not a hateful husband (Deut 22:13-21) was willing to put away his wife quietly thinking that he had found some uncleanness in his wife. Now in my opinion this is the ONLY case I see for putting your wife away and remember Joseph had NOT consummated the marriage so this was very early before the marriage bed had been even used. THE ISSUE AS I PROVE NOW IS OF FRAUD.

1) to have unlawful intercourse with another's wife, to commit adultery with^{^[3]}

Can you now see that the divorce that our King Messiah was stipulating was the same one that the book of Deuteronomy 22-13-21 mentions where an uncleanness had to be found and not just anything e.g. like he believes in patriarchal marriage or the taking on of another wife. Clearly Yahushua showed that by doing the divorce on demand you are forcing your wife to lie down with another man and commit unlawful sex.

As a Rabbi (teacher) my primary suggestion to the woman is not to divorce at all but pray and seek the will of our Father in heaven and bare the situation, this will glorify Him even in your suffering. As a secondary solution if you think you cannot handle it at all I would suggest separation and not divorce. If it is absolutely felt that you want to be released then seek a Get.

Your wife/husband if they are in adultery and in open rebellion then they have breached the covenant and this would be in my mind’s eyes be a reasonable ground for a divorce in our time but the call has to be made with justice and mercy. It would only be right if your husband was given time and if he refused to repent. A certain time needs to be attached to the repentance, my suggestion is at least one year though even six months may be sufficient time to see if things become better or not.

Adultery should mean just that and not what the common term has come to mean in the Christian church. A married man sleeping with a single woman is not adultery but fornication and that is not a ground for divorce but since one could argue that he is in breach of the covenant a woman may decide to file a divorce but the only problem is that neither did she exercise mercy and justice and on top of that what if the man says he will marry the woman he deflowered then the wife has no ground for the divorce according to Torah because the man is then following the Torah provision for a second marriage which is allowed. If the woman claims she cannot bear the situation then she can separate but MUST reconcile back there is no other option. If the woman takes a divorce in this situation without the husband freely releasing her for a sin he did not commit the woman would 100% be in adultery.

Exodus 22:16 "And if a man entices a virgin who is not betrothed, and lies with her, he shall surely pay the bride-price for her to be his wife.

This means the wife would not be able to force her hand and force a divorce. Sorry the Torah overrides you ladies.

If on the other hand He/She is willing to repent then forgiveness is paramount and MUST be given. You cannot withhold forgiveness and hope for yourself to be forgiven at the stake of Yahushua while having a hard and bitter heart toward this situation. Remember Justice and mercy are paramount and top priority in every believer’s life. If the husband was NEVER wrong and you have realised you were wrong then you have to RETURN to your husband even if He has re-married or you have remarried, your marriage cannot stand because God allows biblical Patriarchal marriages and since you may be his first wife it is no problem as he has to give you the position back as before with full honour to restore you. Your subsequent marriage if you are a woman is nothing more than an adulterous affair and cannot stand. Don’t you love the Torah it solves every problem of societal injustice. The truth shall really set you FREE.

Answer) There is no covenant and there living together is just like common law marriage and not recognised in front of God. He does not recognise marriages made to heathen deities. There are many permutations of this so if you are in any of these situations you would have to write to me and ask for guidance to shimoun63@yahoo.com. The advice will be free.

I was very clearly one day in prayer revealed by God to marry two people and the one woman was divorced but her situation was the one I mentioned above. Neither were believers in their marriage at the time of marriage but she became a believer later after her divorce so yes a non-believer can join into a martial covenant with a believer without any problems even if she was divorced as an unbeliever. There were other complications there as well but I can tell you this marriage to the believer was kosher in His sight. So the Father through the school of hard knocks revealed His Torah to me and how to apply it.

I also came across the situation of Deuteronomy 22:13-21 and I was shown by God that as long as the woman has declared to the future believing husband that she had in the past made the mistake of sleeping with someone else in other words “fornication” whether once or many times then the woman is allowed to marry a Hebrew believer without issue as long as the husband is happy that this sin had been repented of and therefore has been forgiven fully by Yahushua on the shed blood on the Tree. To the present husband for all intent and purposes she will be as a new bride never defiled.

Question) My husband beats me up black and blue and is on drugs are you saying I cannot divorce him?

Answer) Divorce is not your solution to the beating or abuse but you can separate from the abusive husband immediately until such time he repents and returns (1 Cor 7:11). You have to pray for him and that is your solution to start with and you are the only person that can save him from his drug addiction by praying and getting him help! If you leave him then who will pick up the pieces in your and his life? Who will help this desperate man in sin and bondage? Don’t be rash but be merciful. Who will be father to your children? If you feel that a certain time has been given to this man and he has not repented then you can go to a Rabbi and take receive a Get (document of divorce) to biblically and hachacikally to allow you to move on.

Deu 21:18-21 If a man have a stubborn and rebellious son, which will not obey the voice of his father, or the voice of his mother, and that, when they have chastened him, will not hearken unto them: 19 Then shall his father and his mother lay hold on him, and bring him out unto the elders of his city, and unto the gate of his place; 20 And they shall say unto the elders of his city, This our son is stubborn and rebellious, he will not obey our voice; he is a glutton, and a drunkard. 21 nd all the men of his city shall stone him with stones, that he die: so shalt thou put evil away from among you; and all Israel shall hear, and fear.

In Israel if a son was unruly, drunkard then after warnings he could be brought before judges and would be stoned to death so there lies our precedence of unruly unrepentant people. Even if a son is fifty years old the parents remain the parents this is middle-eastern culture reality of the Bible, first of all report the unruly son to the parents and if there are none then your congregation pastors or Rabbis should be able to help.

If all else fails then set before YHWH a time limit that you are willing to wait and if he has not repented and returned you can then decide what is the right thing to do but in this scenario again the provision is death not divorce but considering the rules of mercy and justice if you had children and had no support system then

You should take a Get (biblical divorce) and do as you think is right with your life.

I went through a situation where a woman was beaten up black and blue and her husband was on drugs, the woman was very brave not to divorce the husband and the situation lasted about four years on and off beatings and I witnessed the bruising of the woman personally often times being there when the husband swore to the wife and cursed her and I would try to help them calm down. He was also unfaithful and sleeping with other women though probably not adulterous but fornication as the women were single. The situation could not be any worse at the time and I had a lot of compassion for the woman and the man for being on drugs the cause of his problems.

Some of you will be quick to cut the marriage and run for your lives but this woman had two children and did not want a divorce. Later her husband took counselling with her helping him and got rehabilitation and he got healed of his drug addiction completely and then out went the beating as well. The marriage was completely restored from disaster.

The woman is now happily married and that woman by the way is my cousin who is a Muslim and her husband who went to school with me was my best childhood friend. I have never seen such resolve in a woman as much as this one and when I look at Christian ladies it shames me that they have no resolve even with the living God to wait but they rush for the divorce courts at a minute’s notice and their mercy runs thin on the ground and usually the second husband they find turns out even worse.

Later then they decide that it was better to be with the first and want to go back but wrong churchy doctrine is what stops them going back misapplying scripture. Likely their second marriage is adulterous because the break of the first marriage is unwarranted and illegal according to scripture. No wonder the Messiah Yahushua said whosoever has ears listen. I never understood in my ten years of faith why some Christians can be so heartless at times and so brutally merciless yet they received a bounty of mercy from the living God but where is their mercy when it comes to someone else being at their mercy?

Luk 17:4 “And if he sins against you seven times in a day, and seven times in a day comes back to you, saying, ‘I repent,’ you shall forgive him.”

I will emphasise also that forgiveness does not mean abandonment, since marriage is a covenant you cannot abandon your spouse or say you are forgiving them and still divorcing them because you cannot live with them. This is hypocrisy and would not be acceptable in God’s court however in this world’s court you can do as you please with plenty of other disobedient Christians egging you for support, but don’t expect mercy when all you are willing to dish out is hatred.

Question) My husband has been unfaithful and slept with other married women and has given me sexually transmitted diseases do I have the right to take divorce?

Answer) Life is precious and is to be guarded above all, if your husband has fallen into this kind of sin where he is not only adulterous but now has become a carrier for STD I would advise at first instance to separate from him and ask him or give him time to repent. If he refuses or is still continuing to live in sin then in that case if we were living in Israel with Torah rather than in the Diaspora he would be dead, killed by the judiciary with his adulterous women but for all practical purposes at least here in the Diaspora applying equal weights and measures you can divorce him for the sake of your life and of course the life of your children if you have any, I would be of the opinion that you are not under any sin as for that man is dead in your conscience since of his sin he refuses to repent pure and simple and you can safely remarry. Every sin has a consequence and Torah justice is quick no waiting around on death row but my strongest advise is before you jump the gun please give yourself time to pray and think don’t rush the divorce courts. He may be willing to repent. Give him time. If after the time no repentance is shown by him then go to a Rabbi and get the legal Get and then also you can do your local divorce courts for common law purposes.

Answer) For men God provided plural marriages so there should never be a need for a divorce or to put your wife away. Let me explain God set the law in Deuteronomy 21:10 that you were to take care of the 1^st wife even if you took a second wife, now do you want to know why that was put there.

Exodus 21:10 If he takes another wife, he shall not diminish her food, her clothing, and her marriage rights.

In my understanding God never said why would you son want to take a 2^nd wife but instead He knew through His perfect will that this was to happen as men are men and some may likely have a genuine reason to marry a second wife but some may just want to do it for reasons such as I don’t like my 1^st wife so I must get another hence God made the law so that the 1^st wife will not get abused and will always be the principle wife and have Rights for her children also. Some evil men who may try to divorce their 1^st wife purely because they want to marry a second wife as they stopped loving the first wife so God ensured no DIVORCE and no evil occurs in Israel because the women were protected in Israel under God’s Torah as the weaker vassal.

Let us take two Hebrew people and they marry, one then becomes disgruntled, let’s assume it is the man since men are more prone to this behaviour though women may also be but for this example I will choose a man to demonstrate the problem. He gets up one day and divorces his wife and sends her back to her father’s house. Where else could she go? The people who live in the West are clueless on the hardships faced by divorced women in the Middle-Eastern culture. Women are looked down and no one wants to remarry them, they are taunted and subjected to societal abuse, parental abuse, relative’s abuse and worst strangers abuse, who may try to take advantage of them as they are most vulnerable.

Now would the God of Israel want to leave His children out like that? You have to be wrong to think that He would. No, He wouldn’t. He is our God of mercy and the God of ALL Israel He would never want to leave us in distress so He made sure the provisions were there for this abuse not to take place in the first place hence why we can also understand that Patriarchal marriages are His perfect will because it affords wives protection in the household though I know all may not choose this and prefer monogamy that is fine too. No this is not about a fallen world and an allowance as some Torah teachers suggest why because in the Millennium kingdom to come some men will have seven wives. I know Christians love to allegorise away everything but this is not allegory but a real reality like marriage is a real reality in the millennium and children would be born to the believers.

Isa 4:1 And in that day seven women shall take hold of one man, saying, We will eat our own bread, and wear our own apparel: only let us be called by thy name, to take away our reproach.

Now let’s apply a harsher scenario. A Hebrew man just divorces his wife for any reason and sends her out. No other Hebrew man can marry her as she is divorced unlawfully therefore causes adultery (Matt 5:32) then where does this woman go for protection?

The only other people willing to marry Hebrew women without caring about Torah or Messiah would then be outside goyim (gentile/heathen) nations so what do you think would then happen? She would join to a heathen who worships a false god and then she ends up with no salvation. Is that a good thing?

Another man from the heathen clan could take her and does the same thing to her. The poor woman is lost for good. Remember none of her marriages to the heathens is valid or a covenant because she is living in complete and utter adultery and idolatry possibly even worshipping false heathen gods as is her heathen husband. No that is not a binding covenant as some think between a false god and the two getting married under him because the false god does not exist and you cannot bind something with that which does not exist.

Does this please the one true God that one of His daughters had to take refuge in with the local heathens? I would suggest no chance for that. Now you see why DIVORCE as we understand it is entirely wrong. It is JUST not MERCIFUL. This is not only dealing treacherously with your wife but also it covers ones garment with violence. I pray only you would understand this.

Mal 2:16 For the LORD, the God of Israel, saith that he hateth putting away: for one covereth violence with his garment, saith the LORD of hosts: therefore take heed to your spirit, that ye deal not treacherously.

So if God hates divorce does that seem plausible to you that He will allow you to divorce your wife for anything? We have shown that it is not so this is why He enacted laws to protect all the commonwealth of Israel.

A Hebrew man taking one or more wives could decide to add widows. This would be in mercy and justice and not as people think in sexual lust. Paul even spoke about this allowance.

1 Timothy 5:14 Therefore I desire that the younger widows marry, bear children, manage the house, give no opportunity to the adversary to speak reproachfully.

1 Timothy 5:16 If any believing man or woman has widows, let them relieve them, and do not let the church be burdened, that it may relieve those who are really widows.

Paul was admonishing believers who were already married to take on the widows as wives and not saying do one to one monogamy yet we know monogamy is not wrong but a good form of marriage. He was advising what we term Levirate marriage, it can happen in deceased brother’s wives but here in a household of Israelite faith it needed be just blood brother’s as other Israelites were allowed to take on widows as second or third wives.

King David was a righteous man and he married Abigail (1 Sam 25:39) and it was in mercy and justice and not lust as he had many wives before he took her. She was the widow of Nabal (1 Sam 25:3) who was an evil man.

We need to be careful because using our Western worldly standards we can apply the wrong idea on to what the Scriptures teach and end up completely being wrong. Pray that God shows you His laws and gives you understanding of His laws because they are made in mercy and justice.

Question) What if the man lied and turned out to be someone else after marriage?

Answer) The same law in Deut 22:13-21 that applies to a woman can then also be reversed and used because Fraud had occurred, the man claiming to be one thing turned out to be someone else so that marriage can safely be voided and a Get (certificate of divorce) taken.

Question) Can a wife in a marriage stipulate monogamous only relationship and make that binding?

Answer) This has been happening throughout history when women have done this but personally I neither agree with it nor would sign such an ketubah or marriage contract because to me it overrules God’s provision for biblical polygamy and I would contend what if God instructed the man later to go get another wife for whatever reason then what are you going to do with the ketubah that says he can’t. What if the woman withholds conjugal rights from the man and then tells him he cannot go get a second wife as he has signed a contract and she withholds marital relations with him? Then this in my mind creates room for injustice towards the husband and I am personally convicted that God’s laws are above all and cannot be rescinded by man’s laws so no I will never be seen signing such Ketubahs (marriage contracts). I know the Rabbis did in the past sign these so you will have to find a Rabbi who is willing to put pen to paper and be responsible for such a marriage.

Question) What if a husband goes insane then should the wife still be bound to the husband?

Answer) The case has to be decided by a Beit Din if one exists or a knowledgeable Rabbi if this can happen since mercy and justice are our highest calling in Messiah I believe in such a case the woman can be released provided the woman sees fit to do such a thing and decides that since her husband is insane and in a mental institution that she sees no hope of him ever recovering. I would stipulate that a timeline be given such that allows room for the man’s possible recovery before the divorce/re-marriage of the woman. I believe holding the woman bound to such a marriage creates lack of mercy because she does have the right to move on as she may have little children to feed if the situation is one of illness and hopelessness. However we must remember that when vows were taken both parties agreed that they would be together in sickness and in health. One has to then decide what that sickness is and what it means in the long term so as not to dishonour God and make the provision for the woman who may struggle on her own to feed the children.

Question) God divorced his wife the house of Israel and sent her away with a certificate (Isa 50:1) then retook Israel as a wife then why can’t we?

Answer) I am afraid we cannot use this as precedence to break the law in Deuteronomy 24:1-4 that says a wife that is sent away and goes and marries another and even if her second or third husband dies cannot return. Unless you have the ability to die and resurrect yourself I would refrain from such an action. You are not Yahushua and the divorce in Scriptures is allegorically shown to be a case for the release of the wife after the death of Messiah. We know a wife can be released at the death of the husband according to Torah. Now the Messiah had the power to rise after death and then re-take His wife. You and me do not have such powers so to me that law cannot be applied to mere humans.

So to sum up any human oath/contract that stipulates something that is intrinsically against YHWH’s law at least in my opinion is not worth the paper it is written on unless it confirms a Torah precept and any such contracts to be avoided. I know some Rabbi’s would sign these contracts.

The case that Yahushua presented to His disciples was one where the Deut 22:-13-21 enactment would allow a marriage to dissolve because of Fraud. The issue was whoring and the requirement was either public stoning in front of the father’s house or putting away your wife quietly. The question is that if you are a hateful husband and hate your wife then there is no central beit din (House of Judgment) in Israel today for believers where you can take your case and who is going to sanction for your wife to be stoned in front of your father’s house and be killed? Practically that law cannot be enacted unless the 3^rd Temple is here and Yahushua is back on the earth so in my opinion and knowledge that law is right now suspended but still very much valid.

The option that you have thus is the second one where you can put your wife away quietly and not create a scene and yes you can do that provided there is verifiably evidence or personal confession that Fraud had occurred. Wouldn’t you be more forgiving if your spouse confessed? I would appeal for MERCY and JUSTICE.

Matthew 19:10 His disciples said to Him, "If such is the case of the man with his wife, it is better not to marry.''

Yahushua was not contradicting His laws of biblical patriarchal marriage because Christians who lack Torah instruction take this to mean a man cannot have a second wife and that is adultery but this is not what Yahushua is saying at all. A man can have a 2^nd wife and a man can have a 3^rd wife and it is not adultery provided he can keep all three provided for Exodus 21:10 and the number one takes precedence in inheritance and the rights of the children. The present model as stated earlier is one of Roman/Greco thinking and has nothing to do with the Biblical laws of relationship. Biblical monogamy is a valid choice of marriage but is one of a commitment of a lifetime and not for a season for six months.

Yahushua set the precedence for the issue of Fraud (Whoring) you can put away your wife else you must stay put with your wife till your death that is the covenant agreement.

The disciples clearly a bit perturbed because it was the norm in the 1^st century for many Jewish people to divorce their wives if a man did not like her cooking hence now Yahushua corrected what man had corrupted. This was to protect the women. Sadly our culture is fully corrupted by Western Roman/Greek laws so divorce on demand exists to break families apart and no wonder England in Europe has the highest break up of marriages thanks to the corrupted minds of women and men of both believers and unbeliever alike both are bad as each other and I feel sorry for the children who needlessly suffer. There may be many other situations that need to be thought through and each one requires careful and prayerful thinking and certainly not rushing to the divorce courts.

Q) Can I divorce my wife if she is rebellious and wants to celebrate unclean church feasts?

A) If your spouse wants to celebrate unclean feasts the only loving thing you can do is let her and pray for her but this does not command divorce. There is a headship issue and this can only be resolved over time. If you file for divorce you will stand guilty of treating the lesser vassal with dishonour. The other question is that she may not object to you keeping Torah which means you may have some semblance of peace. We are to pursue peace because blessed are the peacemakers. Scripture does not say blessed are the divorce makers.

1Co 7:12 And to the rest I say, not the Master: If any brother has an unbelieving wife, and she thinks well to live with him, let him not send her away.

Be careful here the word to “send her away” some would interpret as divorce but it is not a word for divorce.

1Co 7:15 And, if the unbelieving one separates [kho-rid'-zo], let him separate himself. A brother or a sister has not been enslaved in such matters. But Elohim has called us to peace.

Paul is talking about “separation” unto Reconciliation (1 Cor 7:11) not divorce as some of us would have thought.

The word means to put “space” between you and your wife and it does not mean to put your wife away permanently for divorce.

Mat 5:32 “But I say to you that whoever puts away [apoluo] his wife, except for the matter of whoring,¹ makes her commit adultery.

Also note the word for “uncleanness” is the word which means if she is “whoring” remember what I said about Deuteronomy 22:13-21 the situation is the same. This is the situation for whoring not a marriage where she was with the man for say two years then decided to divorce him or other way around.

The word for “whoring” or as some Bible translators have used the word “fornication” although “whoring” is the correct one. The Greek word is porneia, this is deliberately twisting and mistranslation of Scripture.

Without me even saying anything you would know what Porneia means. It is the Strongs G4203; meaning “harlotry” (including adultery and incest); “figuratively idolatry:” – “fornication”.

Question) God divorced his wife so surely since He could divorce His northern wife why can’t I?

Answer) God divorced Northern Israel, issued her a certificate of divorce, she went away whoring with other gods and became paganised. The present state in many assemblies. The Messiah then died because she would be free (Detu 24:-1-4) (1 Cor 7:39) and He could retake her back. Now are you able to die and rise up to take back your wife? If not then don’t try this exercise as it will be foolish. This was to show the power the Messiah has to redeem the unfaithful wife whom He could die and be raised for but not you and not me. Once we are dead we have no power to raise ourselves but only God can raise us and we have to wait until the coming of Messiah.

Question) Judah divorced his wives in Babylon when Ezra spoke to them so surely divorce was allowed otherwise how could Judah do this?

Ezra 10:19 And they gave their promise that they would put away their wives; and being guilty, they presented a ram of the flock as their trespass offering.

Answer) The issue in Babylon was not one of leaving your faithful covenant wife but one of paganism. You were not allowed to take a pagan/foreign wife outside Israel and Judah had transgressed by doing exactly this so they were living in rebellion to God’s laws hence this was not a divorce in the normal sense as most people think. Do not use this as your tool for divorce. A divorce in scripture technically is a cutting, meaning separation it is not as many people have made it today such as handing a piece of paper and going sleeping with another man by cutting another covenant because YOU CANNOT. THIS IS WHORING. Women who are doing this are committing WHORING and are living in Sin.

1 Corinthians 6:9 Do you not know that the unrighteous shall not inherit the kingdom of hwhy? Be not deceived: neither those who whore, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor passive homosexual partners, nor practicers of homosexuality,

There is no place for WHORES in the kingdom. Sorry I did not make these laws YHWH did.

Ezra 10:18 And among the sons of the priests who had taken pagan wives the following were found of the sons of Jeshua the son of Jozadak, and his brothers: Maaseiah, Eliezer, Jarib, and Gedaliah.

Please note why the writer keeps mentioning the word pagan. This was an unrighteous union. This was forbidden in Torah Deut 7:3. These were even priests who could only take Israelite virgin women but they were also guilty of violating the covenant.

Friends I know what the deal is, I have been through it so I write from personal trials and experience I received and what God has showed me and taught me so do not be hasty and do not be judgmental to axe your marriage you are NOT allowed to do this unless you have scriptural reasons to do so. Be careful of what words you use because the tongue is the member that is hard to control and one which will cause the most damage. We are NEVER to remove our covenantal wife or deal with her treacherously. I pray that the advice is heeded by all believers in Messiah.

Some Rabbis say that my view is a hyper-view and that we can divorce as per the Jewish traditions and how Talmud has suggested. I agree that there are many prevailing Jewish scholars and their views including those penned in the Talmud. There are many schools of thought. Kudos to them all. I do agree with many rulings of the Talmud which I feel are just and righteous but I would disagree that one can divorce for burning someone’s food.

However I wish and desire to follow as God has directed. I know that this is the hardest way to live. There are also questions about what if you wife says I want a divorce and I do not care of what you think. A husband could say the same thing to a wife. They could say we live in such and such government law which allows it.

My only prayer and hope is that I will submit to Him and not make the mistakes made by my predecessors. I submit to His Torah/law and His council. If husbands or wives wish to take the matter into their own hands and divorce the other party then no one can stop that but one day they will have to stand before God and give account. They may choose to be oblivious now and commit what our Master termed adultery in Matthew 19:9 by divorcing their spouse and then go marry another, (note only in the case of a woman not man) so if that happens we just have to leave it in His hands. Such women will not be blessed neither in this world or the world to come!!! So for women before you commit your marriage please make sure that your decision is grounded on to stick for life and not six months or six years!!!

Rabbi Simon Altaf ex-Muslim servant of God zealous for His Torah (Acts 21:20).

Simon Altaf was chosen by God for the special End-Times prophetic calling. A lone voice in the wilderness, one taught by God (Ps 199:120-121), a Messianic Rabbi and a writer. He is an ex-Muslim, called out of Islam to rejoin His people after his long exile.

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^{^[1]} http://www.myjewishlearning.com/lifecycle/Divorce/HistoryDivorce/RabbinicHistory.htm

^{^[2]} http://www.blueletterbible.org/lang/lexicon/lexicon.cfm?Strongs=G630&t=KJV

^{^[3]} http://www.blueletterbible.org/lang/lexicon/lexicon.cfm?Strongs=G3429&t=KJV